Thursday, April 3, 2008

dAMn BUsy LiFE...


I guess by now, u all should know wut i feel..sooooo tired...tired for being a student..tired for being a husband..tired of being a father..whateva!!

Looking back at the same date, last year..I am enjoying my life as a man with a beautiful wife and a great job..But, at that exact time..am I really happy??..the answer is still the same..I feel tired..and I am not happy..I'm too bz solving peoples problem..work as much as i could and make other people become richer..hehe..(sorry bos!!)..so boring to the extent that i feel like i work my ass off..but the return is soo little..so..I look at myself and think..what did i do wrong?..so I came to the conclusion that I need to further my studies..maybe bcoz i'm only a diploma holder..the opportunity for me to improved myself is too narrow..

Here I come..at this very moment..being a husband, a father and a full time student..am I happy?..hehe..nope.. i don't expect that this answer will appear now..so..I dun make any significant progress..same feeling last year..same feeling now..

But, being a muslim, we alwiz being reminded to believe in faith (Qada' & Qadar)..and I do believe in my faith..Allah knows best..I might not enjoy my life now..but i did enjoy the precious moment of realising that I could further my study..I did really enjoy the wonderful moment knowing that I could leave my stupid client with all their nonsense problem..I did enjoy that and still do..

So..the conclusion is simple..maybe we are asking too much..stop doing that!! be grateful and pray to god for guidance and mercy..InsyaAllah..one day..the final destiny that we are looking for will finally become reachable..at that very moment..will we enjoying it??..YES..YES..and..YES..Amin..

Thursday, March 27, 2008

da cHeeR oF mY LiFE..


Praise to God Al-Mighty.. Alhamdulillah..my long awaited journey had finally ends..On 12th February 2008, at 7.45 a.m. my first child is born..weighing at 3.7 kg, she's emerged from her mother's womb through 'Cesarean'..and of course after lonnnnnnnngggg hours of waiting..28 hours..

Alya Irdina Izzati which means Your Highest Dignity is My Pride (Ketinggian Kehormatanmu, Kemuliaanku)..That's my cute lil gal name..we call her 'Alya'..just past thru one and a half months of life, she had already shows her personality..she love water (bath time), just like her mother..she won't sleep unless someone talk to her until she finally get bored (and cry for sure)..she will scream as loud as she could if somebody try to fold her in napkin..in Malay we call it 'bedung'..and finally..she will open her eyes, 5 minutes before her next milk time..not ever one minute late..

Being a father had surely be my prolong dream..but a responsibility for being a father is not even close to what i ever expected..The first week of being a father, i could barely sleep..normally i will take one or two hours of quick sleep..(nap time) whenever & wherever i could..normally in toilet daa..hehe..surely becoz on the first week, alya will open her eyes every two hours and cry for milk..her mother at that particular moment still weak and recovering from her post-natal wound etc..so..its all depends on alya mighty father to take care of everything..

On the second week..my body start to accept the fact that there's no more sweet dream for straight 5 hours..or late nite coffee with frenz etc..but new matter arise..I am keep worrying about the way i do things..is this the right way to hold her?..at this age, is it the right amount of milk?..is it too much?..these sort of questions keep worrying me..but of course..guidance from my parent do helps..sometime..hehe..i think for those who has their own children and extra sensitive grand parent might understand why did i say 'sometime'..

The third week..suddenly i feel like i am the expert..erm..i just do wut i feel right..and Alhamdulillah it turns out to be okay..just like any new things we encounter in life..the initial phase normally the most difficult..as soon as you get used to it, everything will fall into place..thats wut happen to me..on the third week i start enjoying my routine..but of course..there's a moment where you feel soooo tired and angry..my advice..back of a lil bit..fine some space for yourselves..a brief and quiet 10 minutes nap in your car is all you need..(thats work for me..and it might work for you)

Alhamdulillah..now alya is almost one and a half months old..she turned out to be a cute healthy baby..InsyaAllah i'll do my level best to raise her with lots of love and passion..Semoga Alya akan menjadi anak yang solehah dan muslimah sejati yang akan berbakti kepada agama, bangsa dan negara..Amin..